As I said in my last post, the Word of God is living and active. He uses it to convict, to strengthen, and to push us to be the best for Him! In the last 4 years, God has used one particular chapter of the Bible to give me hope, direction, and nourishment--I Kings 19!
(I realize there is more to be gotten from this chapter than what I have gained and in my different states of mind and circumstances saw the scripture with different eyes than others may have. Although others may not gain the same things I did, this is how God chose to use it in my life.)
My brief summary of 1 Kings 19:
Elijah was afraid and ran for his life from Jezebel after the fire of the Lord came down and burned up the sacrifices as well as killed the prophets of Baal. He was the only prophet left. As he ran into the desert and fell asleep. He was awoken by the angel of the Lord twice to eat and drink to give him strength for the journey ahead. He ran to Horeb, the mountain of God where God asked him what he was doing there. Elijah's reply was that he was zealous for the Lord, the Israelites rejected the covenant, he was the only prophet left, and they were trying to kill him. After a mighty wind, an earthquake, a fire, and finally hearing God in a gentle whisper, his reply to same question was still that they were trying to kill him. God sent Elijah back the way he came to anoint others to be succeed him, including Elisha who he threw is cloak around to designate as his successor.
Hope:
The first time God used this chapter to help me was in 2008 as I sat desperate for the Lord to show me what to do about the fact that I was being pushed out of a ministry position for no good reason. I was a part of the singles leadership team where everyone on the team was stepping down except for me. After having a very hurtful conversation with the minister in charge, I felt like Elijah. I was the only one left and with zeal I wanted to serve, but he was trying to "kill"/get rid of me. As I read the passage, I knew I wasn't alone. The Lord had heard my hurting heart. I heard him say...Go back the way you came. I went back to the minister that hurt me and he had changed his mind. He didn't know why he was trying to push me out and apologized. Today he and his wife are some of my best friends. What I didn't know at that time was that God would continue to use that passage in our singles ministry.
Direction:
Two years later when all 5 of us knew it was time to move on from our leadership positions, we spent a weekend seeking God's face for clarity in how to make a smooth transition to new leadership and a new minister. In that weekend, God brought this chapter back to my mind. I read it again. God allowed me to understand how important to "throw our cloaks around" those that were succeeding us. The group agreed that part of the transition would be a "party" of sorts that allowed us to pass wisdom and truth along to those that were coming after us. What a blessing that time was, not only for them but for us as we reminisced about what God had done in our ministry through our time of leadership!
Nourishment:
A month ago, he brought to mind this chapter once again. I was in a state of weariness and fear of inadequacy. It was not the greatest day with my students and the first day I cried because of their behavior and how I responded to it (not my best day as a teacher). I was also asked that day to take on another student to counsel in my "spare" time. I was a little overwhelmed and feeling very inadequate for the job that was before me. I skipped high school youth group to be with God, and he met me in my state of fear through 1 Kings 19.
Here is an excerpt from my prayer journal:
"1 Kings 19:3- I am afraid like Elijah was and want to run away. I want to run because even though you put me among these people and it was by your doing that I face these trials, I don't believe it(your protection) will happen. Elijah called your name and you slaughter the prophets of Baal, yet when someone was after him he didn't believe in your protection. I feel like that. I feel like you have done some great things already this year, but when it comes to facing difficult conversations with people or counseling kids with issues I don't know how to handle--I want to run."
Through 1 Kings 19 the Holy Spirit was convicting me of my unbelief and calling me out of my pity party while showing me that he will provide all I need. It is not in my own strength that I am to live this life, but in His! Just like he was faithful to Elijah to prepare him for a forty day journey by waking him twice to eat and drink, the Lord will prepare and awaken me to the nourishment that He always has ready for me.
"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour."
1 Peter 5:6-8
Elijah, Peter and I are loved by the same God that sustains his creation and prepares us for what is to come. In His strength we will overcome the fears the devil puts in front of us. Through Him we are prepared for the moments our flesh is weak! Whom shall we fear? The God of Angel armies is always by our side!
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