Past Faithfulness Reflected in the Present

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; GREAT IS YOUR FAITHFULNESS!

Lamentations 3:22-23 (ESV)

Yesterday I had the pleasure of walking into Midnight Oil, a coffee shop in Searcy, to the joy of seeing a beautiful face from my past...PEYTON JOY MCVEY!!  We were both so stinkin' excited,  I think we hugged 15 times!!  We had no clue that we needed each other in that moment. The Lord knew that I needed to remember the past so that I could be refreshed in the present. 

Peyton, along with, Ana, Caroline, and Laura were girls that were in my trail guide group at North Atlanta Church of Christ.  This was a group of girls I mentored from their freshman year to their senior year in high school.  We went through a lot together!  Walking alongside them we grew in Christ and learned from each other was what helped me take the step of going back to school to get my Masters in School Counseling, and was also a catalyst in my journey to Bolivia! I longed to live a life where I could mentor women as my job, and these girls helped me see that I could (shout out to Justin Bagwell and NASM for creating the trail guide program). These ladies hold a pretty big place in my heart, so catching up with Peyton and Caroline (she popped in to say hi) made my heart soooooooo happy!  

It was great to catch up and giggle with them again.  I praise God for how much Peyton and Caroline have grown and matured.  I don't doubt that the Lord has done the same thing with Ana and Laura (I do see them on social media).  I am proud of the women they are becoming, and so very thankful I got to be part of their lives!!

My relationship with Peyton, Ana, Caroline, and Laura gave me confidence as a mentor.  It allowed me to see that I do have something to offer others. The Lord taught me through my time with them that we are created to live life in community, to sharpen one another, to share our weaknesses with others, and to be open to the Holy Spirit's guidance within relationships! I would not be where I am today without these beautiful young women. As I look back on my time with them, I see how faithful God was in using me in their lives and them in mine, and as I ponder my life since then I see how God was faithful to use me and grow me through relationships both in Bolivia and now with missionary women.  I praise him for allowing me to see His faithfulness in the past reflected in the present, and it gives me hope in His future faithfulness.  

Seeing Peyton and Caroline was just what I needed.  It reminded me that I am right where I need to be, walking alongside some pretty important women all of the world! Praise the Lord for giving us who and what we need when we need it!  

Psalm 71:22 (NIV)
I will praise you with the harp for your faithfulness, my God; I will sing praise to you with the lyre, Holy One of Israel. 

Psalm 139:5 (NLT)
You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.

SOVEREIGN

Last night I set my iTunes to shuffle and then proceeded to skip songs that I didn't necessarily want to listen to.  I eventually came to the song "Sovereign" by Chris Tomlin.  I googled the lyrics thinking I would sing along but instead I just listened and thought about what it truly means for the Lord to be sovereign over all.  The lyrics below took my breath away.

All my hopes

All I need 

Held in your hands

All my life

All of me 

Held in your hands

All my fears

All my dreams

Held in your hands

Why did they take my breath away? Well, the Spirit was convicting me of my distrust or doubt in the Lord.  I didn't have to ask myself if I truly believed that he had all my fears, my dreams, my hopes, and all of me in his hands.  I knew the answer was "No, I am not trusting him with them".  Why? Probably because I am 34 years-old living with my parents waiting on my phone to ring to substitute teach while I wait for financial support to come flooding in for me to do what I long to do, missionary care. "God isn't giving me what I hope and dream, so how can I trust Him," were my subconscious thoughts. In my waiting, I chose to overlook the good that has come from being in this place or how He has been faithful in the past.  I haven't verbally/ prayerfully laid down my fears, dreams, hopes, and every piece of myself before the Lord lately. It is a prayer I have prayed for others, but not for myself.  In the waiting, distrust arose because what I wasn't getting what I wanted... how selfish!

So I opened my Bible app and proceeded to search for the word sovereign.  Did you know that it appears in almost if not every single chapter of Ezekiel?  Ezekiel truly believed that God is Sovereign! I will be diving into that book soon!  However, in my search, I came across Isaiah 61.  I have read this chapter a few times these last two and a half years.  It is a chapter I go to sometimes to remind me why I love counseling and helping people. This time I read it with a different perspective.  I read it with my heart and mind focused on how my God is over all of it, the good and the bad, the pain and joy, the unmet expectations and those that are met!  We go through the despair, darkness and struggle, so that we can become oaks of righteousness that display his splendor, that the nations will praise him, and that our souls can rejoice in our SOVEREIGN GOD forever!

Read it twice outloud and REJOICE in the Redemption and Restoration that He has for His people!!

The Spirit of the SOVEREIGN Lord is on me, 

because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor.

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, 

to proclaim freedom for the captives

and release from darkness for the prisoners,

to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor and

the day of vengeance of our God,

to comfort all who mourn,

and provide for those who grieve in Zion--

to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, 

the oil of joy instead of mourning,

and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.

They will be called oaks of righteousness, 

a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.

They will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devastated;

they will renew the ruined cities that have been devastated for generations.

Strangers will shepherd your flocks'

foreigners will work your fields and vineyards.

And you will be called priests of the Lord,

you will be named ministers of our God.

You will feed on the wealth of nations,

and in their riches you will boast.

Instead of your shame you will receive a double portion,

and instead of disgrace you will rejoice in your inheritance.

And so you will inherit a double portion in your land,

and everlasting joy will be yours!!

"For I, the Lord, love justice;

I hate robbery and wrongdoing.

In my faithfulness I will reward my people and make an everlasting covenant with them.

Their descendants will be known among the nations

and their offspring among the peoples.

All who see them will acknowledge that they are a people the Lord has blessed."

I delight greatly in the Lord;

my soul rejoices in my God.

For he has clothed me with garments of salvation

and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness,

as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest,

and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.

For as the soil makes the sprout come up

and a garden causes seeds to grow,

so the SOVEREIGN Lord will make righteousness and praise

spring up before all nations.

I mean PRAISE THE LORD that out of death came LIFE and out of our despair and pain we find beauty and joy!!  Can I get an AMEN?!! How GREAT is our God!!  

 He reigns over the shuffling of iTunes and leads my thoughts back to His word where I was reminded of truth.  He shows his love as he reigns and sent His Spirit to convict and remind us of how GREAT He truly is!  Even in my waiting, He is SOVEREIGN!

So as I continue to wait, I pray that I can move forward truly believing...

In your everlasting arms

All the pieces of my life

From beginning to the end

I can trust you

In your never failing love

You work everything for good

God whatever comes my way

I will trust you!

Sovereign video with lyrics: http://www.godtube.com/watch/?v=092EJCNU